How to Grab a Minute
I am writing to you – the special needs/disability community, so I know that we all feel this.
There isn’t enough time.
As parents/caregivers to those affected by disability, we wish we had more time.
Maybe you wish you had more time to reset.
Maybe you wish you had more time to play with and simply focus on enjoying your child.
Maybe you wish you had more time to support a friend.
Maybe you wish you had more time to encourage your husband or wife.
Maybe you wish you had more time to love on your extended family: mother, father, sister, brother, niece, nephew, grandchild, uncle, aunt, cousin, grandparent.
I am with you.
For many of us, because our “extra” time is very limited, we decide that we cannot do justice to any of those things and that often makes us sad. Why? Because we really want to do at least some of them and do them well.
Okay. Pause.
What if we think about this in a different way?
What if we could reset, focus on enjoying our children, support a friend, encourage our spouse, or love on our extended family?
If it was possible, would you do it?
Maybe doing any one of these things is more doable than we think. Maybe we are stuck in thinking it is totally impossible instead of finding a way to make it possible.
What do I mean?
Yes, your time and energy and stamina is limited. However, there are simple, but meaningful steps you can put into action to help you to grab a minute.
GRAB A MINUTE TO RESET
What do you enjoy?
A special treat? Make yourself a cup of coffee just the way you like it and take a minute to savor a sip. Even if you only get a few savoring sips – count that as a way you have reset.
Coffee with a friend – but you cannot get together? Make your coffee and schedule a video chat for just 5 or 10 minutes (or less if that is all the time you have). Just the few minutes you get seeing your friend and sipping coffee together can totally get you going or give you the opportunity to reset your day.
Music? Does music lift you up and give you a new dance to your step? Then I encourage you – purpose to turn on some music even if you only have a few minutes.
Something else? What is the thing that you enjoy? Get creative. Find a way to incorporate it into your life. Make it happen. Let it refresh your spirit and help you to reset. Be satisfied with even a small sampling – a small increment.
It is all in the acknowledgement that even this small moment is good. It is all in an attitude of gratitude for even the briefest of times. It is all about cherishing what you CAN do and seeing it as a gift.
GRAB AN MINUTE TO TRULY ENJOY YOUR CHILD
Often the daily grind leaves you depleted and exhausted. There are days when you feel like you are just going through the motions of taking care of your child’s needs, getting you and your child where you need to be, laundry, dishes, cleaning, driving, errand running, working. You are caught up in all the tasks and duties and don’t feel like you get to just BE with your child. You long for the time to just appreciate your child. You wish for a quiet moment to focus on only them. You desire to have fun with them.
Where are those moments?
When they are in the bath. Even if you only have 5 or 10 minutes, sing a silly song, play with some bath toys with them, show them joy.
Driving in the car. Play some favorite music for your children and sign along.
At breakfast, lunch, or dinner. Make the toast or sandwich into a happy face or something else fun. Read a quick book that they would enjoy.
Getting out of the car. Give a big smile and speak words of affirmation. Even if they are non-verbal or low processing, everyone can sense good cheer.
While dressing your child. Make silly faces. Give deep hugs and short massages.
While diapering. Talk sweetly. Sing a song. Give a short massage with a smile.
Getting them out of their bed. Bring a spirit of sunshine and joy into the room.
In a waiting room. Bring a special book to read quietly to them. Hold their hand. Put your phone away and give them all of the attention. Sing a soft song.
It is all in the acknowledgement that even this small moment is good. It is all in an attitude of gratitude for even the briefest of times. It is all about cherishing what you CAN do and seeing it as a gift.
These are the moments done over and over that build a foundation of love into someone’s soul. These are the things that make good memories. Don’t let having just a little bit of time rob you of making those sweet memories.
For those who are married:
GRAB A MINUTE TO SHOW YOUR SPOUSE THEY REALLY ARE IMPORTANT TO YOU.
Everyone tells you how important it is to focus on your marriage. You know it is true, and yet, you wonder how you can with everything else taking up your time, energy, and brain space.
Simple ways to show love:
Wives:
Write a quick note to go into his lunch. We know one couple who have a tiny note that simply says “I love you.” That little note has been placed in pants pockets, near toothbrushes, at computers, in suitcases, on top of the folded laundry, at the table, on nightstands, next to a cup of coffee or tea, near a favorite snack, and many other places. They love passing that one little note back and forth. (Okay…full disclosure. That couple may be us 🙂
Be attentive when he shares ideas.
Be the president of his fan club and tell him things he is doing well.
Make his favorite meal.
Appreciate the little things that he does, i.e takes out the trash, mows the lawn, does some errands, drives you somewhere, pays the bills, goes to work, loves the children, etc. You have your own list.
Husbands:
Find some wild flowers and bring them home (or stop at the store and purchase a small bunch.)
Offer to take the kids so she can take a walk or do something else she enjoys.
Listen carefully when she needs to chat.
Share in cleaning and cooking and childcare.
Encourage her to gather with other women and make it easier for her to do so.
Both:
Make important decisions together.
Find a few minutes to do something with the children together.
Listen to the other’s point of view without wanting to jump in with yours.
GRAB A MINUTE TO SUPPORT A FRIEND OR EXTENDED FAMILY MEMBER
You really wish that you could extend some love to someone outside your immediate realm. Most of the time you feel like you cannot even get your tasks completed within your own home, let alone reach out to someone outside. That makes you sad.
But, maybe, there are some things that you CAN do that don’t take too much time or energy but that will brighten someone’s day. That is your goal, right? To brighten someone’s world?
What CAN you do to shine a light?
Send a quick text to say you are thinking about them.
Offer to pick up something for them at a place where you are already running an errand.
Write a quick note and mail it. Yes – put a stamp on it and send it away. Personal mail is always nice to get.
Pray for them and tell them you did.
Order something online and have it sent to them.
It is all in the acknowledgement that even this small moment, this small effort can offer up good to someone else. It is all in an attitude of serving and loving and thoughtfulness for even the briefest of times.
God created us to love and serve others. Finding ways to show you care can cause a ripple effect to encourage many. And…it makes you feel good, too.
So, you see — you can. You can grab a minute and make a difference in so many areas.
We would love to hear from you. Email us at Champions4Parents@gmail.com and tell us how you are grabbing a minute in your day.
Much love,
Julie Meekins
CONNECT WITH US:
We invite you to connect with Tom, Julie, and Amy through:
Email: champions4parents@gmail.com
Phone: 410-746-9010 (Call or Text)
Facebook: www.facebook.com/Champions4Parents
Don’t forget our website: www.champions4parents.com
And check out Amy’s book at www.HeartReCHARGE.com
