As a parent, spouse, family member, dear friend, what do you think and how do you feel about desiring healing for a loved one with disabilities? If you are the one with the disability, how do you feel about others’ desires and prayers for your healing? As a person who serves people with disabilities — children (and their families) and adults, what should be your position? We recently had this conversation in person and online with many people. There were representatives of parents, caregivers, adults with disabilities themselves, and others who loved or served children and adults with disabilities in...
I recently participated in a Mental Health Summit online conference hosted by Thrive & Cultivate. I admit that I am new to the growing momentum of getting informed about mental health and particularly what we, in the church, can do to support mental wellness. I had the privilege of watching videos of several presentations of this Summit. There were many eye-opening moments for me as well as reminders of best practices. Here are some brief summaries of things that I heard that particularly moved me. Entering church if you are an extreme introvert or while dealing with social anxiety can...
The real heart and soul of people with disabilities is often overlooked because most people are focused only on what they see as different. Something to ponder: If you are a person living with disability, or a parent or other caregiver of a person with a disability, or if you are a ministry leader who serves people with disabilities: – What message would you like to give to those who only look surface deep. – What would you say to people who fear differences? – How are people with disabilities the same as everyone else? – What else would...
We recently celebrated Mother’s Day. A wide range of emotions are experienced on the day set aside to honor moms. In many groups of people, you will find those who adore their moms and cannot wait to celebrate them. There are moms who appreciate reflecting on mothering whether their children are babies, toddlers, elementary, middle, or high school students, young adults, or older adults. There are also those who are missing moms who have passed on. Sometimes, Mother’s Day is a very painful day for those whose moms are not or were not a positive part of their lives. Too...
First of all, as we take a look at dysregulation in our children, let us remember that no two children are alike – that includes children who have been given a diagnosis of any sort and those who have not. We are all individuals and very unique. However, what we love about parent discussions is that the sharing of personal experiences becomes helpful to other parents. Parents feel validated, empowered, encouraged, and filled up enough to spread the wealth of ideas with other parents. For this very reason, we do our best to provide opportunities for parents/caregivers to meet up...
Six Tips to Help Your Respite Event Go Well I have recently been given the privilege to come on staff with our church to work alongside our Director of Special Needs Ministry. Since we arrived in Lynchburg in 2014, Tom, Amy, and I have been volunteering in various capacities in this ministry and have had great opportunities to get to know parents and kids whose families are affected by disabilities. Now, I get to serve in an official capacity. Just recently, I participated in a Parents Night Out respite event for our families. I want to share what I witnessed...
What are you afraid of as a caregiver to a loved one with a disability? Recently, we had a discussion with a group of parents over this very question. Some of the fears that were stated were: How will my child “make it” in this world? Will they be able to get a job? Will they be bullied all of their lives? Will my child ever have a real friend? What happens when I am gone? Will there be someone who will take care of her? What if a scary situation arises and I cannot handle it? With my child...
One day we were speaking at a conference for children’s ministry leaders about what may be happening inside the child who is constantly moving. We recommended that the ministry leaders consider keeping some fidget toys on hand. We picked up a squishy ball to show as an example. A man in the front row asked if he could hold it for the rest of the breakout session. He explained how it was helping him. He said that he often feels nervous energy and is easily distracted. One of the strategies he had developed to keep himself focused at conferences was...
When parents drop off their children affected by disability, whether those children are young or they are adults, you probably see a wide range of emotions and approaches. For example: Mama or Papa Bear – You know these parents because you can feel the fight in them even as they round the corner. Parents who drop off and run away fast – BEFORE you get to ask any questions because they are afraid you will not take their child if you knew more Entitled parents – Give the attitude that you owe them and that their child should be prioritized...
3 Tips for what TO do Yes #1: Think about who is already there. Build a foundation of serving by loving the ones who are already in your church. Determine their needs and put into place the things that will work to help them feel part of the church family. Think of the person with disabilities and their needs. Consider how best to love siblings. Empower parents with a support group and respite. Yes #2: Share the gospel. In the midst of putting helpful things in place, remember the reasons for ministry. The first and foremost focus needs to be...
